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“The whole Indian system is bloody inefficient- Says who?”, thundered my pal; Mr. Professional (MP) recently when I was cribbing about inefficiency being the principal ingredient of the Indian DNA.
“Have you ever tried registering your property (site/house)? Then you would have inevitably come across the remarkably efficient bribe system. Everything is fixed. The bribe you pay (over and above the registration charges of course) is either a fixed percentage of your property value; or follows slab-rates depending on the property value. It doesn't end there. Each person's share of this pie is clearly defined beforehand, all the way up to the minister; no less. And have you ever stopped to marvel at the process of bribe collection and distribution?”
I definitely saw sense in what MP was saying. I pointed him to this excellent article by Atanu Dey which explains how trucks are routinely overloaded in exchange for a bribe. I was astounded at the way it works – and how seamless the entire process seams to be. Everyone stands to gain – the lorry operator, the corrupt officials at the check-point, the road construction contractor, and not to mention the babus and netas.
That only charged up MP all the more. He now focused his energies on bashing the LPG cylinder delivery chain. “Do you have any idea why you have to wait for 10 days to even 2 weeks for delivery of you LPG cylinder from the day you book it? It's because the dealers are stocking it up and providing it in black. The process is so streamlined, you won't even suspect something's cooking. You'll even dismiss the delay as yet another manifestation of the Great Indian Inefficiency Syndrome!”
Well, well, well. MP's right this time. The various processes and systems which corruption has spawned should be taught as subjects at the various B-Schools. They're probably six-sigma or better. If only this skill had been put to proper use. And here we are, the educated middle class, who's blissfully putting it all down to inefficiency. Ha!
My pal, Mr. Professional (MP) is very upbeat about his child these days. Every conversation has to have at least a few mentions of his 10 year old daughter. Like thousands others like him, MP is a very proud parent, and wants the best for his child. He always goes the extra mile to give his daughter the best he possibly can. The best of clothes, toys, education – everything. In fact, MP revealed to me once that the amount of resources consumed by the child has been the single largest expenditure for the family ever since his daughter was born.
And now, I arrive at the real point of this post. When I met up with MP recently, he was with his Childhood Friend (lets call him CF). CF has an 8 year old son. CF has radically different views about bringing up a child. He put an entire new angle to this child-care thing.
CF insists that although he yearns to give his child the best, he does not equate “the best” with “the best that money can buy”. For example, he has chosen not to enrol his son in one of the “exclusive” schools (even though he could have afforded one had he stretched his finances a little). Instead, he has sent his son to a good middle-class school. He wants his son to interact with children from all backgrounds. And being a middle class guy himself, he believes that his son should go to a middle class school too. “There is no dearth of excellent-quality middle class schools is there?”, he argues. I think I agree with CF here.
Secondly, CF believes that a child brought up in such a protected environment will find it difficult to face the challenges of the world out there. A child who always travels in an A/C car, who has never boarded a city bus, who only rides an upmarket bike to college is out of touch with reality, he says. I am not sure whether I agree entirely with this opinion. I feel that no matter how protected a child is, as he grows, he will get acquainted with the ways of the world and will learn to stand up for himself.
CF's third point was about the child's sense of social responsibility. He feels that the trend of projecting only the best of the world to children makes them unaware of the sufferings of, and reality about their fellow human beings. His contention is that such children are less likely to do anything for the society. I guess he has a point there.
CF's final, radical punch was yet to come. He put forth a question to MP: “Imagine you had not had a child; and that you had spent all the amount that you are now spending on her, in philanthropy instead. Can you imagine how many under-privileged children's lives you could have turned around in that amount? And, can you imagine how many children's lives those kids might in tun improve when they grow up?”
I find this argument to be .. well .. far too extreme. Suggesting one not to have kids because one will end up spending a lot of money on the kids – instead, spending the same amount of money on dozens of underprivileged children!!! I mean .. if CF had suggested that – for example – imagine cutting down on the amount you spend on your kid by, say 20%; and imagine putting that money into social causes; well that would have been a far more reasonable and acceptable argument. Or would it? I wonder how CF would respond if I challenged him to undergo a 20% cut in his pay with the assurance that this amount would be used for philanthropy!
There is one thing I agree in this far-fetched point of view though. It has been my observation (and by no means is it a generalisation), that people who have come from not-so-rosy backgrounds are more active when it comes to charity – than people who have never had to struggle in their past. They would even undergo some sacrifices in order to give to the underprivileged. And by the end of the debate between MP and CF, the only take-away I had was that it might be a good thing to expose a child to the real world from an early age in order to make the child a good citizen in the future.
But hey, why am I worried about all these things? I ain't having kids anytime soon! I would like to know the opinion though, of those of you who have kids or are planning to soon. At least that way, when I bump into CF next time, I am more prepared to enter into the debate rather than remain a mute spectator!
.. or within budget.
****************
Boss (B): Hey Mr. Employee, can you give me a rough estimate as to how much time you might take to drive from Ouagadougou to Tarawa? Employee (E): (Here goes Mr. Bonkers again). Er .. boss .. I dont even know what continents the two places you mentioned are located on. If you could give me some time to do some study before I give you an estimate .. B: Huh? Driving is supposed to be your primary skill, is it not? You are expected to be competent enough to put at least a rough number against this task. E: (How can I “put a rough number” without even knowing what I am supposed to do Dammit!) I understand boss, but these 2 places could be as near to each other as 5 kms .. or as far apart as five thousand. Could you at least give me time to look up the locations of these places? B: (Believing he's striking a compromise) Tell you what; you give me a very broad guesstimate now because I need to project this to my bosses right away. Then you can revise it later. E: (reluctantly) Ok Boss. I don't know why, but the names of these places remind me of Africa. So I assume they are both located in Africa; and I take a wild guess of 30 days if you give me a proper all-terrain vehicle. B: Oh .. but I don't think we have that much time. If I go to my boss and tell him that we'l take 30 days, I think he's going to freak out. Let's do this. You send me a mail saying that your estimate for this drive is 23 days. Then we will work it out. What say? E: (Do I have a choice?) @#$%^
Mr. Employee goes back to his desk and finds out that Ouagadougou is the capital of Burkina Faso, a country in Africa (he got that one right!), while Tarawa, to his horror, is located in the Kiribati Islands in South Pacific!How in this whole ellipsoidal world would he drive from a small country in Africa to an island diametrically opposite?
**************** Ok, let me begin at the beginning. I was having a discussion with my friend, Mr. Professional (MrProf), about the routine delays in projects in India (or anywhere for that matter). Construction projects, education initiatives, healthcare programmes – whether in Government space or private sphere – they all have one thing in common: Time & cost over-runs. I have quoted here verbatim, the story which MrProf told me in this context.
I gave it quite a bit of thought, and I reached the conclusion that MrProf is right. The flow of inefficiency usually goes like this: It all begins right at the top. Like at a Minister, or Executive level. They are the ones who commit to something outlandish in order to get votes or customers. They then put pressure on the project planners to squeeze in things so tight that storage companies would pay a fortune for such kind of squeezing capability! There is invariably one level of project planners who are totally dispensable – all they do is seamlessly transfer the pressure from a level up to a level down (many bureaucrats in the Indian administrative setup belong to this category). This level is where the planning is botched up. The pressure eventually reaches the “worker” level (this is the root-level where the actual implementation is done). At this point, Boyle's law kicks in. Under all the pressure, the temperature begins to rise too. We all know how many mistakes a heated up worker on-the-ground is liable to commit!
Result – project screwed! This is not all that far-fetched, even in case of the B-I-G projects (see the programmes on Discovery and NGC – like “MegaStructures”, or “World's Biggest” to know what I mean). And more often than not, who is the one whose head is on the chopping block? The worker-bee.
For example, take the same story as above. How would it play out when Mr. Employee complains that the drive is impossible?
Employee (E): Boss, the Ouagadougou-Tarawa drive is impossible. Tarawa is on an island bang in the middle of the Pacific. Boss (B): But, you were the one who committed to me in the last meeting, were you not? How can you not honour your commitment? E: But boss, I was not given enough time to do a background study before coming up with an estimate. And it was only an estimate anyway, not a commitment. B: Well, you should not be using the “lack of time” as an excuse to cover up for the error in your calculation. You should have taken all this into account before you gave me the 30-day number. And it was a commitment because I communicated this number to the higher-ups. ... E: (are you just arrogant or plain stupid?) Sorry to interrupt boss, but we are not talking about the feasibility here – we are talking possibility – which is zero. (you want to drive thousands of miles in the Pacific? For Gods' sake). B: Well, we cannot displease the powers-that-be. You will have to put in extra effort and get the task completed in 23 days. E: @#$%^
**************** OK. That was exaggerated. But the point remains: Most projects/initiatives, even though initially badly planned, can still be brought back on track. But they rarely are – because of the all-pervasive I-just-wanna-save-my-neck gene which everyone carries in abundance these days.
I conclude this off-topic post (rant rather) with the statement that I think in addition to what MrProf has told me, it is the passing-the-buck attitude which is blocking transparency, efficiency and a better world on the whole. Countries might become “developed”, per-capita incomes might sky-rocket, infrastructure might boom – but as long as the attitude of the masses remains under-developed, so will the world in general.
Peace.
Mr. Professional (Mr.Pr) is in the news again. He called me up to tell me that he had bribed a traffic policeman last week. Here's the story:
Mr.Pr is driving to work one fine Monday morning. He reaches a T-junction where he has to take a right turn. He is at 40+ kmph when the signal turns amber. Mr.Pr does not want to suddenly brake – so he slows down, but continues taking the turn. At that moment, the signal turns red. Mr.Pr has just completed the 90-degree turn when he sees a cop waving to him to stop. Mr.Pr obliges. He gets out of the car to speak to the cop. The cop, who is about the same age as Mr.Pr's father, is not very rude or gruff. He's smiling and polite, but strict. Mr.Pr knows he is in the wrong – so he agrees to pay the fine. The cop radios the “inspector” and informs him of his catch. Apparently, they are in for a 10-minute wait since the inspector has to come from god-knows-where. The cop tries to bluff saying that Mr. Pr will have to cough up a fine of Rs.300 and his dad (since the car is registered in the dad's name), will have to pay Rs. 500. Mr.Pr informs the cop that he is aware of the rules and that there is only one fine – Rs. 300. The cop realizes that he is dealing with a well-informed citizen and drops the lies. He tries to strike a deal - “You pay me Rs. 150 and I'll let you off”. Mr.Pr denies – saying he'll pay the stipulated fine and insists for the receipt. After 10 minutes, the cop starts playing games. He says that the “inspector” is dealing with other offenders and he'll take at least half an hour to arrive. Mr.Pr sees through this blatant lie – but he is getting late for office. There's nothing he can do. So he reluctantly hands over 2 hundred-rupee notes to the cop. The cop does not even return the “change”!
Well, it seemed like an open-and-shut case to me. Hundreds of such incidents occur on the roads of Bangalore every day. But I could sense the Mr.Pr was not happy about the incident and I was at a loss to come up with a reason for this. The conversation that ensued was something like this:
Me: Spill it out pal – what's playing on your mind? Mr.Pr: I almost never break the rules – you know it. Even when people all around me are jumping red signals (often because there are no vehicles on the intersecting road) – I still stick to my guns. The only time I do break the rules is when someone waiting behind me bullies me (normally the cabbies who honk the life out of me). Me: Agreed – but on this occasion, you did break the law – so you did deserve to be punished. Mr.Pr: Yes – I am not debating that. What I am disappointed about is – why is it that only people who largely follow the rules (the operative word being “largely”) end up paying fines; and people who largely show scant respect for road rules (again – the operative word being “largely”) are let away?
How come those rowdy bikers who perform wheelies on public roads don't even feel afraid when doing so? Are they smug in the feeling that they have nothing to fear as far as the traffic police are concerned? Why is it that autorickshaw drivers who drive at night without headlights (or any other lights for that matter) never come to the notice of cops? Why is it that motorists who line up at signals in the wrong lane, on the other side of the road median never end up paying the fine? (case in point – Shivananda signal where this is the norm – even when a cop is manning the junction) How come it never occurs to the cops to demand Pollution-Under-Control certificates from vehicles which spew out kilotons of exhaust? How come drivers who speak on their mobile phones while driving go undetected by the cops? How come those drivers who routinely flout one-ways, “no-free-left”s and even dangerously jump red lights never end up being issued a fine? Most importantly, why is it that the cop did not have the receipts with him when he had caught me? He has no right to hold me there for half an hour, does he?
I stopped Mr.Pr because I knew that he was full of many more examples – and that what he had just poured out was just the tip of the iceberg. I firmly reprimanded him saying that all these points were irrelevant. He had broken the law and had paid for it. Full Stop.
But looking back at the conversation, I found myself nodding my head for each and every point he had made. I have asked these questions myself several times. I shudder to imagine where we are headed as far as road sense is concerned.
I end this post by hoping that each and every one of us wake up to our responsibilities during driving. If the traffic police cannot contain the terror on the roads, let us, the citizens take the initiative to do so. Looking forward to a more road-disciplined India. JAI BHARAT.
Guess what? I recently got a call out-of-the-blue from my old pal Mr. Professional (I encourage you to read this previous post about Mr. Professional - i'l call him Mr.Pr in the rest of this post - to get introduced to him, and to put the current post into perspective). I am glad to inform my readers that Mr.Pr has since gotten himself a life outside of his "professional duty".
Ok, so he surprised me by giving me a ring after a long, long time. He breathlessly told me that he had got a new job sometime mid of last year. And, to my horror, I realized that he had called me up to seek my advice on a pressing matter. Ya, I know - ME!! of all people! And what exactly was he seeking advice on? To put it in his own words: Hey Kiran, what would you rather do? Romance Katrina Kaif on-screen in return for nothing? Or get beaten up on-screen by Salman Khan in return for a FilmFare Award? Here he goes, I thought! You see, Mr.Pr has had a history of losing his marbles every now and then :). But I had no clue that he was so blinded by Katrina that he even dreamt of acting with her (if you can call what she does as "acting" .. hmmph). I just dismissed this as one of his bouts of craziness; and changed the topic - ignoring his repeated and vociferous pleas to "discuss". Imagine his cheek - calling this a "pressing matter". Ya right!
It was only a few days later, when I was flipping my way through some old blogs on my blogroll (this one in particular), that I discovered how profound this crazy-sounding Mr.Pr really is. Reading through that blog, and linking the opinions of the author to the conversation with Mr.Pr, the tube light in my head slowly lit up (after flickering several times of course). What Mr.Pr. really was asking me was: Hey Kiran, what would you rather choose? OR
I'm totally stumped by this thought process from who I've been thinking of hitherto as "Stupid ol' Mr.Pr". I have now started seeing him in new light. And no - I have no answer to his question. Even after losing sleep over this matter for quite a few days, I am still unable to decide what I'd rather do. All I can do is come up with more questions, like
Would I get involved today in something that is against my principles/goals, provided it will lead to my goals being achieved in the long run? (2 examples I can think of are - Business Risks and "eradicating" the corrupt politicians from my country).
Like i said - why ME of all people?? All Mr.Pr has succeeded in is unsettling me with this train of thought! Anyone care to counsel him?
This is a very interesting (and disturbing) story. It is a true life story about a guy I know. We are talking about a professional who has spent the most of the last five months abroad on business. He occasionally comes home and one would be forgiven for mistaking him for a guest at his home! Read on ….
In the past five months, his father has been doing all his “official work” for him – right from paying phone bills to doing paperwork for their property. At an age when he should be serving his father; his father is serving him!!! But, he says his hands are bound – “Duty Beckons”, he says.
In the past five months, he has never taken his mother shopping. “I don’t have time to go shopping with you – why don’t you go on your own? I will give you my card”, he says. Upon being told that it’s not his money that his mom wants; but his company; he retorts saying he’s “busy” – The Call of Duty is his excuse.
He has not visited his village for more than a year now. Why should he? After all, he’s this big shot who’s flying around the world, living out of a suitcase. Don’t you know his profession, his Duty, demands more of his time? Village and relatives can wait.
In the past five months, he has missed every single important occasion in his dearest friends’ lives – weddings, engagements – everything, without the slightest hint of guilt. He has never been there when his friends needed him. “Sorry buddy, I’m too busy with my profession.”
In the recent past, he has completely ignored his resolution of doing something for under privileged children. The last time he did anything for them was more than eight months ago. He has all but forgotten about his responsibility towards his motherland, his country. Why would he? He’s touring the world on the pretext of his professional Duty. Country, society, underprivileged children – they all are not as important as his Duty, are they?
In the past few months, he has put his hobbies on the backburner. He has not posted a blog in the past 4 months; and he hasn’t done any serious photography for as long as he can remember. But hey, who’s got time for some dumb hobbies? He’s a professional. His Duty takes precedence over all these irrelevant things.
Well, well. Our professional sure does sound like a villain doesn’t he? I think I need to admonish this guy – or at the very least, ask him a question or two.
Mr. Professional, here are some questions for you.
- Isn’t taking care of your parents and keeping them happy your first and foremost duty?
- Don’t you know your business, profession is temporary, but your relatives will be there forever?
- Don’t you think it is your duty as a friend to be with your friends on the most important days of their lives? Don't you know the only way to have true friends is BE ONE?
- How can you forget your responsibility towards your country? You, the youth of the country, MUST play an important role in shaping its future. What happened to all the commitment you made towards the children who are the future of the country?
- Is it not your duty, too, to set aside time for your hobbies, interests and passions? Especially since some of your passions have the potential to make a difference in others’ lives?
Mr. Professional, it is high time you get your priorities right. You have to decide which duty comes first – the duty that pays, feeds and clothes you; or your duty and responsibility towards family, friends, country and society. Signing off with the hope that you choose sensibly.
Disclaimer: This is my personal blog. All the views and opinions expressed on this blog are entirely my own and do not reflect the views of my employer, organization, relatives, friends, acquaintances or any other person/entity.
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