When I Interviewed Ambika Soni in My Dreams!

Abhi pointed me to this transcript of the Devil's Advocate episode where Karan Thapar interviewed I&B Minister Ambika Soni. Watch out for the number of times she uses phrases such as “debate”, “mechanisms in place” etc.


I guffawed so hard at the stupidity of it all that I fell down from my chair, hit my head against the floor; and fell unconscious. But even then the ghost of this interview did not leave me. I actually dreamt that I was interviewing Ambika Soni. And here's how the dream went:


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Me (Interviewer): Hello and welcome to [Insert-the-name-of-any-interview-show-here]. This is Kiran Rao; and we have as our guest today, I&B Minster of India, Ms. Ambika Soni. Ministerji, let's start with the question of censorship. What makes you think your ministry qualifies to tell people what they should be seeing?

Ambika Soni (AS): Well, I don't think that's true. I think we should have a public debate. I have committed myself on the floor of the house. I have an absolutely open mind.

Me: Ministerji, your ministry recently disallowed screening of one of the episodes of my interview show because it had a scene showing me kissing my wife. Are you implying that I was doing something immoral?

AS: No. I am not saying that. But there are mechanisms in place to deal with such cases. It is not my creation.

Me: Ok. So you accept, then, that that episode had nothing shameful?

AS: Kiran, I am not going to table my personal opinion on the matter. It is just that there has been a mechanism in place for this. I am ready to have a public debate.

Me: Ms Soni, lets lighten the mood a little. Let's switch topics. Who is your favorite cricketer?

AS: As I said, I have an open mind and I am prepared to have a public debate to resolve the issue and reach a conclusion.

Me: Huh? Ok. Let's try this. Would you like to tell us about yourself? Your history? Family background?

AS: Well – I committed myself on the floor of the house .. I have an open mind ... ..

********************


At that moment, I felt some cold water running down my cheeks and woke up :D I gave a good scolding to the friend who had woken me up. I so wanted to know where the interview was heading!


6 comments to When I Interviewed Ambika Soni in My Dreams!

  • Hilarious Kiran. Read that article in CNN before reading your blog(Purposely). You have got awesome humor man. I really felt like kicking that friend of yours who stopped your from dreaming(. It was getting so interesting and stopped abruptly. Either way.. +10 for this one.

  • I would rate this as one of the best posts in the recent past.It was hilarious.You have your finger on the pulse.
    Incidentally,this is the same mnister who said that Americans should be given a tit for tat,after she heard of SRK detention at US airport.May be she is a fan of the actor or may she also speaks out of turn.
    Keep publishing such posts.

  • I am glad I pointed you to that interview. You have come up with a truly hilarious piece.

    Maybe its time to start a "public debate" on whether this minister must remain in office!!

  • hahahah! such jackasses!

  • :-)

    Hilarious!
    But most politicians actually answer like this! they never say anything properly!

  • @PC: Thanks! and let's have a public debate to decide whether we should kick my friend who woke me up :D

    @BK Chowla: Thanks. And yeah - she's the one who said we should retaliate to the retention of one arrogant Indian at a US airport! I guess she's just an unabashed fan.

    @Abhi: You mean she should commit herself out the door of the house???

    @Pavi: Ssshhh .. Don't insult jackasses now!

    @JSincro: You bet! They probably undergo a course on how to be as meaningless as possible. But, they can at least be entertaining while they're at it (a-la Lalu Prasad Yadav). This lady here seems to have mastered the art of boring everyone to death!

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